As I tear down my sofa, I get lost recounting today’s experiences. On Sunday’s I go to church. Due to recent vehicle issues, my visits to the House of God has been at a stop. Today, I was able to go. My wrench slips on the bolt holding the center console in place, and my knuckles crash into the metal framework. I grimace and continue.
“Church was good. Pastor did an outstanding job delivering the message.” After a few more twists the bolt releases it’s grip and the console crashes to the floor. “Still, after all this time, I notice the little things. It’s the little foxes that spoil the vines.”
I move on to the next set of bolts and begin to unscrew a seat from the frame. My head begins to ache, but I ignore it and keep working. “A former church did a number on me. I always think there is something or someone who doesn’t think I belong there. Or it’s a look. Something always comes up.” The seat falls to the floor with a loud bang. I look at the seat. I always dislike getting looks from people. It makes me uncomfortable. Unlike text messages or emails, a look isn’t difficult to decipher. It’s meaning is written in plain sight. The narrow eyes, the firmness of the mouth, it all speaks volumes.
Of course, one can never be sure if ‘the look’ is for them. Perhaps the individual is having a bad day, or got bad news. Maybe, they’re married. Or has an upset stomach.
Or maybe it’s just me thinking too much.
Church shouldn’t be about what people think about me, but still, I have a hangup when it comes to what others think of me. The only person that counts is the Lord. As long as He likes me, and understands, then the opinions of others are weightless.
No matter the road, no one walks it alone. The Lord walks it with us, and on occasion, others join our party. Take it from me, don’t let the little things hinder you. Find your peace and enjoy the walk.