I have questions and no answers. This seems to be my lot in life. My heart is sore from trying, why must everything require such immense effort? Last night has been difficult. The First Cavalry Division decided to honor the sacrifice of veterans that served with the First Team during Operation Iraqi Freedom. My friends were shown and while it is very nice of the staff at Fort Hood to recognize them, it is very difficult for me to relive their deaths. Time doesn’t heal anything.
It seems like yesterday that we were all laughing and poking fun at each other. We were willing to take on the world, and make it give us what we wanted from it. Eager for battle, ready to be tested in the ultimate contest of wills and marksmanship, we had no idea what we were asking for. Everything was a joke until we stood in the desert and realized that we were all each other had. For us that was enough. It all went wrong quicker than we wanted it to.
Death is part of life, it is no respecter of occupation, status, or name. We all have an appointment with the Reaper. War is fraught with opportunities to die for your country. Unfortunately, people die. I grieve the loss of my friends even now, 14 years after the fact. In vivid detail, I can remember every emotion that I felt when I was confronted with their deaths. Tonight, will be sleepless. There is no doubt that I will dream of war. It should come as no surprise that I hate this holiday.