I have a secret longing to simply pass from existence. You know, sort of like now you see me….now you don’t. This weirdness is driven by the loss of my friends in Iraq. After watching them be violently removed from this earth by the actions of other people, I don’t want to be here anymore. My life feels less (sometimes). Yes, I am aware that this may strike some people as horrifying or perhaps insane. It is okay. I am not suicidal nor am I in need of an intervention.
In many regards, death would simplify matters for me. There are some perks to being dead. Bills no longer exist in the abysmal darkness. You can finally catch up on your rest. The stress of everyday living is no more. Of course, there are cons to everything. Cons include but is not limited to: you are dead, friends and family can no longer participate in your life, you are dead, and you now face God to give account of your life and how you lived it.
With that in mind, perhaps remaining in the land of the living for the time being is a good idea. I wouldn’t mind seeing the Patriots win another Super Bowl. Nor would I mind seeing the Braves win another World Series. There are several books that I haven’t written, or read so there are more things that need to be accomplished. Many places remain unchecked on my travel list, so checking out new destinations would be nice as well. Looking back, it seems that death at this point of my life would be more of a hindrance than a blessing. I better ask the Lord to grant me a few more years before I kick the bucket.
Seriously, I am not suicidal. I love me some me. I am my own biggest fan. Although I do have some thoughts on how I would like to leave this world when it is my turn to go. First, I would like to die with a mouthful of bacon and fried potatoes. This would be an awesome way to go. Eating two of my favorite things and then cease to exist-perfect. Or maybe die after reading the last word in the Bible. Another excellent way to die. Too round of the list of ways that I would like to die, the last is to either be at the beginning or the end of the newest Dean Koontz novel. This would be an excellent death.
If there are ways that we all want to check out, there are bound to be ways that we don’t want to kick the bucket. Here are a few ways that I DO NOT want to die. The first would be in a hail of gunfire and IEDS at a convenience store. That would totally suck. To survive Iraq and all of the ensuing crap, and then come home and die like this would be devastating. The second way that I would not like to pass away is at work. Seriously, who wants to die trying to make their boss one more dollar for their already maxed bank account. No thank you. The last way is swimming in the ocean with people who are bleeding. Death by man eating sharks and God knows what else would just suck on an epic scale.
In all seriousness though, death is part of living. Cancer, heart attacks, kids texting and driving, drunk drivers, drug overdoses, crazy ex-wives, and more can conspire to kill us. Thinking about it can provide some perspective on our lives. Are we doing all we can to prepare for our trip into eternity? We always hear that when we stand before the Righteous Judge, we will give account of our sins. This is true, but in my mind I am convinced that we will also give account of what we did with our time here on earth. Did we live our lives or just go through the motions?
See, people are real quick to throw out this parable or that sermon, but what about the one where the master gives his employees talents? The master goes on a journey and when he comes back one guy has used his talents and added the same amount to his. Then another guy also used his talent and was not quite as successful as the first one but he prospered as well. The last guy buried his and just gave it back. I can’t help but feel that God will be displeased if at the end of the road, we simply say that we worked and slept our lives away.
God did not provide us with life to make other people rich. Nor did He provide us with years upon years for us to waste it on vain pursuits. Yes, He put us here to witness to those who do not know His love and grace. Yes, He put us here to worship Him for His goodness and mercy. He also has given us the opportunity to live our life and to enjoy the world that He created. Part of His mercy was giving us free will. We get to choose the path that we take. The Scripture reads something like this, “the steps of the righteous man is ordered by the Lord.” Given this truth, I believe that God has a plan for each of our lives. Yet, His plan does not inhibit us from living our lives to the fullest.
Granted, you can’t be full of the world and do the will of the Lord. However, God is not a bully with a baseball bat waiting for you to make your next mistake. He is not going to punish you for failing. Hence, the purpose of the New Testament. When we fall, we get up and ask for forgiveness. Then we dust ourselves off and follow Him.
I am going to end my blog with this plea. Enjoy your life, do all you can for the kingdom of God, but don’t forget to make the most of this precious gift that God has given you. You guys take care and I will catch up with you all soon.