There are several people at the flea market that I find to be weird-ish. They have this air of calm, even when the world is disintegrating around them, they maintain a positive air. I don’t have that. If the world is falling apart, I can usually be found with a sledgehammer helping destroy it. Generally, my temper is through the roof, my mouth is going 90 to nothing, my hands are creating hieroglyphics of doom, and I am gazing into the heavens seeking permission to unleash the fury. Then a day or three later I calm down until the next time the world falls apart.
Raymond, James and Rachel are my sources of inspiration. A nuclear bomb with no fuse could land in the parking lot and they would just shrug and go about life with the same positive air. I would be completely beside myself and looking for someone to take with me in the eventual fallout of nuclear winter. We are at the opposite ends of the spectrum but they inspire me nonetheless.
What I would not give to be optimistic in the face of life’s never-ending, life altering crisis. To stare in the eyes of life and smile, what a tremendous feeling that must be. How they do it is beyond me. Of course, if we were all optimistic, who would shake things up? Who would misunderstand that non-invasive look that the pessimistic person just received?
My goal this year was to be more optimistic. Unlike those who will shelf their goal when the going gets tough, I continue to try to look at the bright side. I may be positive that life sucks, and that there is no way possible for me to get through the year, but at least I am positive. Nah, I am trying. It is hard to change your perspective when you have held on to the negative one for to long. However, I am totally bent with trying to maintain a positive frame of mind. I suppose we will find out how it goes.
That will do it for now. Take care and I will catch up with y’all later.