Life has often thrown me curve balls. Some days it seems that I should wear a full set of plate armor in an effort to avoid being dinged up. “En garde villain!” Moments do make living worthwhile. Beating my brother in fishing always brings me joy. Flea markets and visits to Goodwill also bring me mirth. However, not all remembrances are pleasant.
Samuel Paul, my youngest brother, was born stillborn. My brother and I was so excited that we were going to have another brother. We planned out what we would do with him, teach him, and would just enjoy having someone to share our adventures with. My mom carried him for nine months. She kept going to the doctor with labor pains, and he kept sending her home saying it was false labor. Sammy drowned.
My dad came home and told us. With tears in his eyes he explained that we needed to be strong for mom. We cried. Then wiping our tears on the back of our sleeves, we went to Forrest General Hospital to see mom. I can still remember the smell of the hospital. Bleach is what I remember. A lot of it. Entering her room, I could see that tears stained her cheeks. My heart quaked and my bottom lip trembled. As I hugged my mom, sorrow came rushing out of my slight, nine year old body. She hugged me for what seemed to be an eternity. “It’s okay. Sammy is in a better place.”
While I know that Samuel is in heaven with Jesus, here on earth his big brother still misses him. My hope is that one day, I will finally get to meet him. Hug him. Join him as we worship the Lord and spend the rest of our lives knowing that our journey is finally over.

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