Money troubles

Have you ever been poor? Like so poor, the dirt thinks its better than you? I have. Currently, I am selling everything that is not nailed down. Generally, my motto is to outlast the horrors that arise every month. I swear, somedays it is all I can do to beat back the creditors. They are more than happy to take my money. Sometimes, it seems like I put myself in the predicament of choosing starvation over paying bills. While I do like to eat, it is no fun to let your bills pile up. I would like to be comfortable enough to live. I don’t want to be Bill Gates rich. Or Trump rich. I just want to be able to have a steak when I feel like it. Or totally leave the Ramen Noodle diet for good.

I am aware that money does not bring happiness. However, if I had to choose between riding a bike and driving a car, I choose the car. Still, you must be able to put gas in your vehicle. Otherwise you better start pedaling. I try to be faithful in all things, even paying my bills but it seems like there is no end to the amount of money that I must shell out each month. Often, I feel like a passenger on the Titanic. “Ooh look honey! Another leak!” In the dark, murky waters of financial freedom lurk monsters.

Granted, most of my problems are because I have not always been a good steward over my money. I am honest about my lack of control if nothing else. Divorce did not improve an already dire situation. I was angry, when the judge asked if I agreed to pay 775 dollars a month child support, I agreed. Then it was 40k alimony, college tuition for both children, and insurance. It seems like I hit rock bottom and have never been able to crawl out of the bottomless pit. I would like to say that I have gotten better at it. The truth of it is, that I have not improved that much in the financial arena. It is a Charlie Foxtrot to end all CFs.

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