Scattered perspective

It is early morning here in North Mississippi. I am awake, but not really setting the world on fire just yet. I am having a cup of coffee and contemplating where life has taken me. I am also wondering what it is that I seek out of my remaining life here on this planet. Do I spend the rest of my life studying different things to broaden my knowledge? Do I spend time writing to see if I can ever achieve a published novel? Am I just wasting time until Death arrives at my door? On an on the questions race through my mind, but answers prove to be elusive.

I have had a good life. I grew up poor, but we had a blast. My mom always made sure her boys had enough to eat. She raised us up to be good, Godly men. My dad made sure that we had an excellent work ethic. He also made sure we knew how to treat the women we dated, and how to provide for the one that we chose to settle down with. I am proud to say that they are my parents. I hope that I have not proven to be a disappointment to them.

I chose a career in the military. Far and wide, I have traveled the world. The sights that I have seen are nothing short of awe-inspiring. Yes, I went to war. I bear the scars of my devotion to my country. However, that phase of my life is over. I retired from active service, thus my conundrum this morning. I have been a college student over the course of the past few years. I am tired of the rigors of academia. It would be different if I was seen as a person who is seeking to expand my horizons through truth seeking. It seems that I am nothing more than a number, a paycheck if you will. Ah well, my GI Bill is almost completely used up. I suppose the smart thing would be to finish this degree and take satisfaction in accomplishing that.

I have various interest. I love to read novels, write articles and travel. If I could spend the rest of my life doing that, then I would not be writing this. My check does not cover extensive travel destinations at this point. Alaska and Montana are the places that I would like to go to first. I have been to Europe. I am okay if I never make it back there. I would like to travel America since I have proven my devotion to her. The mysteries that are here at home are nothing short of amazing. I would like to make my way to every state of the Union. Museums are calling my name. Art appreciation is one of my great loves, and I would enjoy visiting the Met, the Smithsonian and other great museums here in America. As an aspiring novelist, I enjoy going to writer conferences. I attended my first this year. It was an excellent experience. To meet people with the same goals and aspirations and express ideas together is a unique experience. It helped me to push through the hinderances that held me back.

Love is a mystery that I have yet to solve. The beautiful woman that I am seeing now has had a tremendous impact upon my life. She has shown me that life with another human may not be as frightening as I thought. It is a strange feeling being vulnerable. I am having to adjust, and it has not been an easy transition. However, I feel that it is worth the trouble to do so. In the end, I will just have to take it one day at a time and work to ensure that my days are full of happiness and joy.

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